Think Rebecca Black’s ‘Friday’ Was Annoying? Check Out ‘Chinese Food’!

Alison-Gold-Chinese-Food

OK, so I think most people unite in thinking that ‘Friday’ was a pretty awful song … and yet most of us (even me, unable to drown it out in a sea of Mary Halvorson and John Zorn) can sing most of it off the top of our heads. And if we don’t think THAT is the worst song, there is the next viral ‘hit’ by producer Patrice Wilson, this time pairing with 12-year-old Nicole Westbrook on The Thanksgiving Song (I’m not sure which is worse … the awful song or the creepy pedo vibe in the video!)

These songs keep the word ‘ersatz’ planted in my head. The word means ‘an inferior substitute copied from something else’. Like most pop sings, there is something immediately familiar in these tracks as they distill common chord changes and beats from other popular songs.

Patrice Wilson, not to be stopped with his skill for making abysmal yet catchy songs that grab 15 minutes of internet attention, is BACK! His muse this time is tween Alison Gold. And this time he stretches out – aside from appearing in a panda costume at a sleepover with a bunch of underage girls (creepy!), the song plays out a bunch of racial stereotypes – which is offensive enough, but made worse because they get half of them wrong!

OK – so let’s start that we have a pre-teen whose first lines are about ballin’, clubbing, and hugging making her hungry. If she had a lacrosse stick and the next line was about shopping at the mall, it would just be a stereotype and not so creepy. And as the image at the top shows, the video uses the girls made up like Geisha and wearing kimonos … neither of which are Chinese traditions (they are Japanese). Ugh.

Oh, and did I mention the song is CRAP?!? Yeah … but you KNOW you’ll click on it anyway … and I’M SORRY in advance for when you find yourself singing it tonight!

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