As I mentioned this morning, I had planned a Valentine’s Day #TBT around the trip Lisa and I took to the Captain Daniel Stone Inn in Brunswick Maine for our 6 month anniversary. My memories from that weekend are strong and incredibly positive – we had a blast the whole time, did lots of shopping, spent too much money, ate too much and drank too much champagne, and celebrated our love, our new marriage, and the joy of being together.
But I also remember getting more than a couple of comments – how ‘cute’ it was to celebrate 6 months, how we were newlyweds and it would wear off soon enough, how it wasn’t even a ‘real’ anniversary, and the inevitable ‘wait until you ___’ remarks.
Fortunately we have never cared what anyone thought was ‘the right time’ to celebrate our love or relationship or anniversary. I mean, next month is another anniversary of our engagement … you can bet we’ll celebrate! Does our marriage negate our engagement? I don’t THINK so!
Over the last few weeks there have been a few celebration posts, including from Sara and Cori. The comments for all of these posts were uniformly positive, which I think is awesome and shows how cool the community is, and also perhaps that the blogging community tends to be positive and supportive rather than confrontational and critical.
In my opinion, if you haven’t had your choice to celebrate a non-standard event, one of three things is true:
– You aren’t sharing that celebration with others, in other words it is truly a private celebration.
– You aren’t ‘getting it’ when people say things.
– People are talking behind your back.
There is also the possibility that all of your friends/family/coworkers are totally supportive of you deciding to take a vacation day to celebrate the 4.5th anniversary of the first time you got froyo together. But since we live on planet Earth, it is safe to assume that unless your celebration is on the ‘approved celebration list’ … you are being judged.
Sound harsh? It was meant to, in order to get a reaction. Chances are you had one of three reactions:
– People TOTALLY judge us …
– What do you mean? Everyone is SUPER supportive all the time! (i.e. defensive)
– Who really cares what other people think about our celebration?
Last Friday Lisa and I went out on a date – the boys had a dance, and we felt like it. Tonight we are going ballroom dancing, because the opportunity presented itself*. Every chance we have, we take the time to celebrate our relationship and the fact that we actually like being together.
If someone chooses at this point to tell me how and when I should celebrate after nearly 22 years of marriage … I would just laugh.
I celebrate my love every day, every time I get to be with my wife, every moment we have together, good times and challenges, all the little memories and moments. Because ultimately it is Lisa and I alone in this life together, so I am just glad we are happy that way!
OK, tell me about how you celebrate and what ‘obstacles’ people have tried to put in front of you?
* Funny story on ballroom dancing – I had been mentioning that it would be cool if we could find a local class, and a couple of days later Lisa was at work and someone came in and mentioned offhand about dancing. When Lisa asked she found out the woman taught ballroom dancing at the local community center, we made the call and here we go!